Most of us have been there. Invited to a party or social gathering that we would love to go to, but then… that little voice in the back of heads tells us that going would be a bad idea. Not because of drinking too much or seeing our ex, ect.. but the fear of actually having to talk to people. I am actually a recovering “antisocial addict”. I feared even the thought of talking to someone new. It would throw my heart into overdrive and my palms would turn into the grand rapids. I mean. What would I say to even initiate a conversation and worse how could I keep the conversation going? This fear caused me to miss out on pretty much half of my college career, but like I said I’m in recovery. We are social creatures and we are meant to socialize with each other. So let me explain the way I am trying to work through this problem. The first step is actually getting out there and this doesnt mean you have to talk to someone. Feel free to sit in a park or any social place and just try to relax. Comfortability will come with time. I spent most of my time finding times to go sit somewhere. Do homework or just sit and enjoy nature. Take it all in because this step is only the first in making social waves. After you feel comfortable with this, (Trust me this next step is the most uncomfortable for some) just say hey to people in passing. Don’t feel like you have to say anything else, this is a big step. Try to raise your voice to a normal tone because I know when I first started I would have the quietest hey you would never hear. Actually let the person hear you because it will raise your comfortability, plus it is less awkward for you and the other person if they can hear you and most people will even say hello back. Do this step until you can actually start asking people about their day and small talk. If you can do this I already feel like you beat social anxiety and you should too. The only way to really beat this anxiety is to face it head on and make small steps towards your social goals. Just realize that everyone else is a person just like you and no one is perfect. Don’t let any person make you feel inferior. Oh and P.s. guys. Remember to simply smile. It does wonders for social interactions and for boosting your mood.

In this day in time it seems that anywhere you look you can see relationships and couples. Both good and bad. But the majority of relationships involving people below the age of about 30 fail. Why is this? If you look at history and the marriages of our grandparents and greatgrandparents, you will see a good majority of success. I believe that the age of the gentleman has slowly faded away over the past few generations and now we can see all these guys that think it’s fun to play with girls’ hearts. The age of “swag” instead of class. Condoms instead than flowers. Guys nowadays dont understand the little intricacies that make all the difference when treating a woman. Holding the door, Opening the car door for her, pulling out her seat for her at dinner, and even standing between her and the street when walking on the sidewalk. You may ask why is this important. But the reason our ancestoral men were taught these things was not to just make girls feel special. Sure that is part of it because a true gentleman makes his woman feel like a queen. But the real reason was to engrain in men’s minds that they were held to a higher standard. Get lazy and you dont deserve a woman and the woman would hold a man accountable too. But nowadays we as men have gotten lazy and women believe that this new age man is how it is supposed to be. That it’s normal and what they deserve. Why does this generation of women deserve substantially less of a gentleman than others before them? They dont. So men.. When you take a girl out on a date. Be a gentleman. Look up some characteristics if you dont know them. Dress well, flowers, hold doors, and call her beautiful (Not Hot). And women. The next time you go on a date be on lookout for these things. If he is portraying a gentleman then appreciate this. He is actually trying as much as you are and is putting his best foot forward. Let’s bring back the age of the Gentleman.